Español: Al Puto
20 u blow me
25 u blow me and i fuck u
30 u blow me i fuck u at my place
 
Fuck, I don’t have cash. Well, not colones. I was coming back from a work trip in Colombia and had saved 60 dollars in case of airport emergencies. I’m one of those guys who thinks anything can happen to me at an airport and that surely nobody will help him. I checked and there in my wallet were the three 20 bills. I calculated the exchange rate at 500 colones the way I have done it since high school because I know nothing of economy and then I had 30 thousand. I can blow him and he can fuck me. Fuck, I don’t want him to fuck me because it always hurts me when they fuck me and I’m not going to pay you for something that will hurt, he’s a man-whore not a dentist. So, what do I want? Fuck, I’m about to pay for sex for the frst time and I don’t even know what I want.
 
- Dude I don’t have colones, only dollars
- Doesn’t matter dude I’ll exchange them
- Ok I have 40, I only want to suck you anyway
- Alright send location
 
I told him 40 because I did not want to end up with nothing, although I didn’t know very well what I wanted to do, I did know what I didn’t want and that was to pay to go to someone else’s place. Tat is why I pay another 400 dollars for my own, so not to wake up mommy when I arrive at dawn, and now I guess to bring man-whores as well.
 
About 15 minutes passed since I sent him the location of my apartment, Grindr said the dude was around 500 meters away. It was the frst time that I became nervous to welcome a stranger from Grindr. More than nervous I was anxious.
 
Do I fix myself up? No fucking way, he has to like me. Does he have to like me? not really, it’s me who is going to blow him. And if the dude doesn’t wanna touch me? Kisses, certainly not, shit I hadn’t thought about that. Well it’s obvious, the man-whore’s username on Grindr was “Straight $” and that was precisely why I greeted him with a: “Hello, how much?”
 
Almost by instinct, because faggots’ natural prey are straight men. We wanna steal them from the nest of their girlfriend and momma, stick them in a cave, slice them up, and lick them empty. It is the upmost triumph: to vanquish the oppressor, naked in a bed, and hard for you.
 
- I’m outside
- It’s the building with the balconies, don’t see u
- Yeah, but on the corner smoking
 
I wanted to see him from the window before opening the gate. Tat the fantasy that by instinct made me write to him became true. Tat he was a pinta , that I became scared that it was all a scam and that really he was 1 here to assault me, that he was one of those hot bodies that can’t afford the gym but became ft in construction works, that he would have a wife with kids and girlfriend with kids all at the same time. Tat he was the one I could never have, only with forty bucks. And he was. At least an acceptable version of the fantasy: clearly
 
Term used to refer to an offender or a dangerous person. 1
 
chata look with white belt and he didn’t look like a big thug from León XIII, but surely he could handle a 2 small weapon. Most importantly, the body at least harder than the little pillow I am.
 
- Rasta, you smoke weed?
- Yes, not right now though, thanks dude
- Can I smoke in here?
- Yeah, yeah, go for it, it’s all good.
 
I was dying to ask him if he had to smoke to forget that it was a dude who was going to blow his cock and not a woman with big titties. I was dying to ask him all of that, but at the same time I shut up to not ruin the fantasy. What if he was a faggot who was just hungry? Because chata faggots, there’re tons. What am I doing paying a faggot to blow him? Honestly, there are faggots that would pay me, darling. And that the man-whore baptised himself “Straight $” in Grindr did not mean a thing, I have had tens of “Straight Curious”, “Curious and Married” and “Discreet Bi” that are more locas than I. Locas but not dumb because 3 they know that by saying they’re not faggots they catch more faggots. Animal instinct I call it, or that we’re basic like animals, I don’t even know anymore.
 
- Well, if you want we go for it man
- OK, let’s go in the bedroom
 
I freed my Karina “if you were this pillow what would I not do to you?” Bolaños and I started giving instructions, without right to question not him not I. Standing. Take your shoes off. No, I’ll take off the rest. Lie down. Arms behind your head. Keep the rosary. Open your legs.
Te man-whore could be a whore for a lot of reasons, but one of them was because he could. Tat piece of equipment was enormous, caramel coloured, without deviations to either side, and with two ping-pong balls hanging which were perfectly symmetrical. I measured them myself with my tongue. I kissed his feet despite his tickles, I brought his legs to the extremes of the bed as if he were a gymnast and not a man-whore, I bit his nipples like I hate having mine bitten and I sucked his life out of his penis but without being able to spill a drop. And I wanted more, I wanted to kiss that mouth stinking of weed because I’ve always preferred smoking out of mouths. I dove in.
 
- Dude, sorry not that
 
I went back down. Te smooth chest, the warm arm pits, the tense biceps. But I am capricious and tried once more.
 
- Dude I already told you, everything but that
- Uh dude, I don’t get it
- I have a girl
- Does she know?
- No, are you crazy
 
It was all I needed to hear. I rose, opened my legs and sat right on the middle his body. I will pay you more. Te man-whore smiled mockingly, as if saying you locas are all the same, as if pitying me because he will never fuck me as deliciously as he fucks his girl.
But that doesn’t matter to me, fuck me because you have no choice. Fuck me because I’m going to imagine that your fucking me just as deliciously as you fuck her. Te best sex of my life lasted only 3 minutes. I couldn’t last more than that with the man-whore inside and exploded in me through every hole. I was drained and exhausted, yet satisfed.
 
- Dude, could I hit the shower?
- I came all over you sorry
- Yeah, yeah but I’m all sweaty and I’m going home
- Go for it, the bathroom is right next door
- Tanks
 
The man-whore took a shower and even asked me for a squirt of my Hugo Boss. Now it seems like an abuse, but at that moment he could’ve asked for the stars and I would’ve brought them down. I gave him all the 60 bucks that I had and we fst bumped at the gate. I came back to the apartment and took a nap on the couch that still smelled like weed and everything seemed lovely. When I woke up about half an hour latter I found another message from the man-whore on Grindr.
 
- Dawg, just now when I took the shower, I lef a ring in the bathroom save it for me it’s golden with my name I’ll drop by one day
 
I went in the bathroom and sure enough there was the ring on the shower’s foor. Came back on Grindr and blocked the man-whore. I need that ring, that is my war trophy, he can buy another one, now he has 60 bucks.
 
1. Term used to refer to an offender or a dangerous person.
 
2. Term used to denominate the members of an urban tribe that share geographic characteristics (usually living in poor 2 neighbourhoods), of appearance (they wear loose clothing and use gold chains, sun glasses and caps) and musical tastes (primarily listen to the reggaeton genre)
 
3. Pejorative term to refer to men with feminine or very mannered characteristics. Homosexual men have appropriated the 3 term and use it to name and call each other.
 
 
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